We all love the idea of love at first sight and yearn to feel that tinge...that spark...that some kind of a confused feeling in your head at the sight of someone. We love the romantic books and movies that tell the stories of the perfect girl meeting the perfect guy just out of sheer accident - a glimpse at a friend's wedding, a fellow passenger in the train or a geek in your class who went unnoticed all these years until just this very moment. How nice it would be if we would bump into our soul mate just as easily...one fine day - suddenly out of the blue! Would live for that moment now, wouldn't you? Just how lucky would you be to have that chance. You would never let that moment pass you by, make sure you go right ahead and make the move just so as to make sure you don't let go the chance of your life. But wait now - would you really make that move? Tell her / him that you felt some cosmic connection over just one glance? That the world suddenly began to seem brighter and worth living in just because of that one glance? Really?
Well, I urge you to think again. Have you ever found a girl / guy in a party so cute that you couldn't take your eyes off her / him? Have you ever had a huge crush on someone (possibly for ages) but never got around to telling them assuming it was just another silly crush! Have you ever went on talking to someone so endlessly that you lost all track of time and then kept wondering how did that ever happen? Have you ever had that awkward moment with your best friend whom you would have known for a million years but never felt at a loss of words before? And out of all the times you faced these or any other such similar situations (or let's call them "moments" for a better feel) have you had the nerve to speak out to the opposite person that well - something just happened! Of course, some of you might have. But here's how a majority of us react:
- Ignore! - we just recoil and pretend nothing ever happened
- Justify - try and convince ourselves that it was just a glance and nothing more. Or that it was just cos he / she was looking so damn hot! Or that you had been talking for so long that you were bound to run out of words at some point, nothing really odd about that!
- Reason out - so what if there was a moment - it was one moment and that's all! Nothing more to it. Period.
Well, these seem the most appropriate approaches to justify something completely incomprehensible. And yet, some time later - could be later at night on the same day, or a few years down the line - but some time later, when you rethink of that moment, you realize that that was it. That could have been it. If only there had been something more to it - even a sign that there was actually something more to it - then maybe, just maybe things would have turned out differently.
But the point is still the same. Do we do anything about it even then? No. The question is why? It's quite simple actually. We educated people with our white collar jobs are so proud of being brought up in the rational world that we need a solid reason for anything. Irrational stuff bothers us, confuses us. We have so many logical rules set in our life that anything that defies logic leaves us completely lost. We plan our lives to the T and know exactly where we want to get and how. We know the right qualities to look for in a life partner when we do start considering settling down. So much so that even if the perfect person were to come and stand right next to you and stare you in the eye, you would turn a blind eye just because they don't fit your perfectly defined "rules". Rules that say that there is a protocol for such things. That such things can't just happen out of the blue. That there isn't any substance to it unless it is crystal clear. That one moment cannot and must not define the course of your entire life.
These rules withhold us from even accepting, let alone expressing, that there was actually something significant that took place. If somehow we do get around to accepting it, we call our own selves foolish to fall for such charms. We blame the novels and movies for brainwashing us and pinch ourselves back to reality. We urge ourselves to ignore that moment and move on as if nothing ever happened. In fact, we even take a step further and make ourselves believe that nothing happened for good! After all, "deciding" on ever lasting love over one moment is all too risky! It could blow out in the worst possible ways. So the "sensible" thing is to leave it behind us and move on.
And move on we do. Until that one day - suddenly out of the blue - when you recall that moment and wonder, that things could have been different.
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